Full Speed Ahead!

Things are happening so fast now that I actually don't have time to blog about one thing before the next thing happens. It's funny. All that work in the beginning - the slow, slogging pace of it - and now, all of a sudden, all at once the dreams behind that work are coming true.

I have my New York State Driver license, the camper is insured, I have my Social Security card in my own name (a full two weeks early), and, yesterday, I got the camper registered.  I have plates!!!  It is a temporary registration; I have ten days to get the camper inspected.

Experience has taught me not to wait for anything and so I spent some time this afternoon dialing one number after the other, looking for an auto shop authorized to inspect vehicles for the DMV that also dealt with campers. I finally found someone on Long Island.

Now, to the average Californian, a two hour drive is nothing. The New Yorkers I've talked to all recoil in horror when I say that I'm taking my camper that far for service. I'm just exceedingly grateful to have found a place.

The plan is for me to get the camper from New Jersey in the morning and drive it to Long Island for this inspection. HA! Ok, now that I've gotten that off my chest, I am claiming power and success and calm for this trip. I will drive my 24' pookums over some bridge into New York and then find the Long Island Expressway without getting stuck under some low laying bridge, scalping my baby in the process. I will find the autobody shop and the inspection will go well.  No one will be harmed in the making of this production for Bach Rescue Pastilles are with me. This is a special occasion. Pray for everybody.

Snagged (again)

I'm waiting for my phone to finish charging before heading to the DMV. Again.  As I wait, I'm facing the very real possibility that my dreams of the RV life might be over! (For now).  To recap (do this slowly, I find it helps):

I need to register the camper.  To register the camper I must have 1) A New York State driver license and 2) Insurance on the camper.  Fine.  I'm heading out to get the driver license now.  Fingers crossed.

Part two . . . well now, therein lays the rub.  You see, there is front end damage on the camper.  Fine.  I am now learning that 1) Only certain insurance companies insure campers. And, 2) Nobody wants to insure a camper with damage on it.  Even for one day.  Without insurance, I can't register the camper.  Without registration I can't move the camper.  Without moving the camper, I can't get it fixed. Without registration and insurance I can't store it at the RV park with very reasonable rates (Did you read all that slowly?)

But I could get it towed!  (Never mind that the thing drives on its own, ok.) The first quote was  $250.00 (steep but do-able) plus $100.00/day storage.  Get out!  And the gentleman at the company I called couldn't think of anyone who could fix it. That freaked me out until a good friend pointed out that the Cruisemaster is really a van; I just needed someone who worked on vans. That calmed me down a little.

Unless I can find a way to get a one day permit to drive the camper to a location where I can store it for a reasonable price, I am facing the very difficult reality of having to junk my baby! This calls for ice cream. Except I'm lactose intolerant so I'm just going to think about ice cream.

DMV Blues of the Under Documented

All ambitious projects have snags in them; mine is no exception. I purchased the RV, fine. Now I need to move it perhaps 60 miles down the road from where it currently sits and store it while I decide how and when to do the repairs. Simple, right?

Most people are aware of how challenging it can be to live as an undocumented person in the United States. Most are unaware, however, of how difficult it can be to be under-documented, even if one is actually legally residing here. Just lose more than one piece of ID and see what happens, especially if you were not born in the U.S.

So, here's what had happened was.  First, I lost my certificate of naturalization (my citizenship papers, for the uninitiated). I actually don't believe I lost them. The most likely scenario is that I sent them to the Immigration people (they were called the INS back then) when I petitioned for my ex-husband's green card. They, in turn, never sent it back. If that is not the case, I have other suspicions but I am not at liberty to share them here. Ahem.

Then my passport got disappeared. I know how that happened. After the divorce, I asked my ex-husband to kindly return my passport to me. At the time that I, ah, removed myself from our shared residence, I could not remember the infamous "safe place" where I had put it. My ex-husband told the judge that he had found my passport and that he was riding on a bus in North Carolina when someone stole it from the outer pocket of his book bag. Whatever is making you scratch you head right now, believe me, the judge thought the same things.

Then I lost my driver license. Meaning, it literally fell out of my pocket on my way home from the grocery store. Ironically, as I had left for the store I had thought to myself, wouldn't it be just horrible if I lost this last remaining piece of government issued ID that I have?

Since then I've been skulking about town feeling very much under-documented, using my faculty ID at the grocery store, avoiding friends' gigs at bars, and praying that I never have to drive. Now you catch how hilarious that is, right? I'm going to live in an RV. Hahahaha. Right.

I comfort myself by believing that I am being allowed to experience these things so that I can better empathize with people who suffer silly yet mountingly significant misfortunes, one right after the other. Truly speaking, I cannot judge.

So why haven't I simply gotten a replacement driver license? Well, you see, in order to get a New York State driver license, I must have six points of identification, including one that proves my date of birth. Without citizenship papers or a US birth certificate I have been sort of stuck. Never mind, I thought, I'll just go back to California and get a replacement driver license. Except that, without a driver license or passport or other form of government-issued picture ID, I could neither fly nor drive.

I called the New Jersey Motor Vehicle Commission to find out what I needed to do to register the RV in New Jersey (where I preferred it be registered). It turned out that without a 1) New Jersey 2) driver license, I couldn't register the vehicle in New Jersey. WHO KNEW?! Just because I own a car doesn't mean I'm going to drive the car and why do I have to live in . . . that was not a battle I was going to win so I dropped it. Then I realized that I also could not register the RV in New York since I didn't have a New York license, either. My only option was to register the camper in CALIFORNIA!!! I could get a 20 day temporary registration in New Jersey but I'd have to have a driver license with a picture on it to get it. And, I wasn't going to drive the camper across the country to California quite yet. Especially since I wouldn't be able to produce a driver license in Texas along the way. It's all in the details.

So I called California.

California told me that they could send me a document (an abstract) giving me permission to drive (heeeyyy!) but it would not have a picture on it (ohhhh). I can't use the abstract to register the RV (in any state) or to fly to California. I'd also have to wait 7-10 days to receive it.

I decided to go the the New York State DMV to see if I could get a New York State driver license without presenting one from California. Thankfully, I did recently (finally) replace my citizenship papers. It took four  months and cost me $345.00!!! But, with proof of my date of birth, I could finally begin the process of changing my driver license.

With my citizenship certificate, faculty ID, social security card, divorce decree (for name change purposes) a blood sample and a picture of my California driver license in hand I headed for the DMV. I'm kidding about the blood sample but, at the rate things were going, that was about all I going to have left for ID.

Mercifully, the DMV is not far from where I live. The office opens at 8:30am.  I arrived at 8:45am and it already felt crowded. Being there brought back memories of the bad old days when going to the DMV meant an all day venture into officious hell and the even badder old days of lining up outside the INS at four a.m. in the dead of winter like cows waiting to be milked. Except the cows got a barn!

Things have really changed, though. The line moved quickly and the clerk was very courteous. I discovered that all I need is the abstract of my California driver license (yaaaayyy) and the documents that I already have to get the New York State license.  Then, with proof of insurance, I can register the  RV. See? Simple. I was on the bus and on my way back home at 9:15.  I'll be back at the DMV in 7-10 days.